How much would you invest in your relationship before marriage to decrease your likelihood of divorce? $100, $1,000, 2,000 maybe more?  Did you know that couples who participate in premarital counseling and coaching reduce the likelihood of divorce by over 30-50%?[1]   In fact, couples who invest in premarital counseling report having higher relationship satisfaction in their marriages.  In general, couples report that premarital counseling not only enhances their commitment to the relationship, but it also creates an affirming and bonding experience.[2]

 One of the reasons premarital counseling may contribute higher relationship satisfaction and lower divorce rates is about intention and investment.  Although they get blended together, the wedding event and the marriage are actually two distinct things:

 The wedding is a wonderful day to celebrate the milestone in the life of a couple and the significance this milestone has to family, friends, and community.

 The marriage is the relationship itself—although it existed before the wedding, the ritual of the wedding births the relationship into a new stage—the two “me’s” have officially become “we.”  And like all birthing processes, all moments are not easy, smooth, or easily controlled. 

 When a couple invests in pre-marital counseling, they are making an investment in the process of going from me to we.  This process allows them to be intentional in the wedding process.  It also establishes patterns and practices needed to sustain the marriage.  This emotional investment becomes a nest egg in the relationship bank account, and the practices regularly make deposits that will help sustain the couple over time.

  If you are engaged, invest in yourselves and your relationship with pre-marital counseling.  To learn more about premarital counseling and to schedule a complimentary consultation, contact me.

[1] Kepler, Amanda. (2015). Marital Satisfaction: The Impact of Premarital and Couples Counseling. Retrieved from Sophia, the St. Catherine University repository website:

[2] LaMotte, E.  (2014).  A Case for Pre-Marital Counseling.  Retrieved from